Thursday, October 23, 2008

Reality, Life is still good.

Well, I contemplated posting about this subject. I thought about not doing it because I don't really want to look like I am looking for sympathy, or pity...because I'm not. After all this is a blog, a journal. It is a place where you write your feelings and express your thoughts. So...here goes....
I got laid off Tuesday. I lost my job. "Due to the economy" Polka Dot Design had to let 6 people go - and unfortunately I was one of them. I have to say it was not a shock. I was kind of expecting it because the business had slowed down so much. I wasn't expecting it so soon, but figured it was coming.
It is weird I don't work there anymore. It was a good job. One of the only places I could stand to work. (rather than being home with Denver) I figured I would be there for the long haul, or at least until Jason told me (finally) I didn't have to work anymore. I suppose I took the news OK. It was sad to leave the friends I had there, and sad that it happened so abruptly, but on the other hand it was like I had a plague or something or I was some sort of criminal being escorted out. I would think after a year and a half being there I could have gotten a little more respect.
There are so many things make me upset about the layoff. I mean it is right before the holidays to begin with. That totally sucks. The only thing that went through my mind when I heard "we're going to have to let you go" was Denver's Christmas. Is that wrong? That is all I thought about at first.
It was just a weird situation all-in-all. Some of you already know the background of what has been happening and that I WAS scared of losing my job. The secrets that go on there, and the hush hush of anything and everything. Something was wrong with that place...and I guess it is good I am out now.
I have had this feeling inside of me that I am worthless now. It is so different being laid-off, or fired than it is leaving on your own will. This was not my choice, and I would not have made this choice. It was made for me and I had no say in it. I went home that night feeling depressed, and empty. I felt sorry for myself and wanted everyone to feel sorry for me too. It was weird.
Since, my spirits have been perked up. Just yesterday, my first day as an un-employed woman, I just got a wave over me. A sense of peace and contentment. God totally took over, and put me at peace. HELLO, KATY OPEN YOUR EYES!!! Everything is ok. I looked around and realized that my life was still good. Even though I lost my job, I still have Jason, Denver and Porsche. I can't help but be happy. Heck, I'm on vacation right now! This is AWESOME!
I am lucky enough to be able to take off a short while until I find that perfect job. and I will. God will put in in the right place at the right time, and it will be fabulous! I can't wait to see what is in store! I'll be closer, happier, and...well, happiness is enough!
So, long story short...I thought that when reality hit me, I would be upset and lost for direction but it actually showed me the truth. My life is good. Actually it is awesome. I've got a great family, majorly awesome friends...and a peace about where I am that I just can't explain.
Maybe being laid-off isn't such a bad thing after all!

7 comments:

MelissaBrwn said...

When my Jason was fired it was some of the best times for our family. On the other hand it was also very hard before we realized it would workout!!!!!
Will pray for the right job for you. Enjoy your vacation! I bet Denver would rather have more of his mom than a big Christmas.

Jess said...

God is good and he has a plan for you...

We are both jobless now? So how's about a little Houston roadtrip?????

I love you!!!

Jess said...

PS--I left you three messages after your text the other day...I have been thinking about you.

So what about Switzerland???

The Wilsons said...

Being "Let Go" is not so bad after all :) But I miss you already BFF!

Elizabeth said...

Everything will be great! Think of all the christmas decorating you can do!! wooo!!!!

Lace said...

Katy it sounds like you've had a crazy up and down week. I can not sympathize with getting laid off but I can with the bad week. It started last Saturday, a lady ran a stop sign and hit mom and gmom and totaled her van, Monday I was doing home health and my engine blew up and the first quote was $8,000, then Friday before I left for the game Carlie called (she had Benson) and said a man ran a stop sign and hit them! All week long my prayer was that I did not know what God had in store for us but that I knew and I had faith that we would be and are always taken care of! It always seems like when we are at a really good place in our lives the Devil starts wagging his tail to try to throw us off. All week long God has taken care of the Eoff family by protecting us and not allowing anyone to get hurt and by finding alternate ways to fix my car (that shouldn't have broken by the way!) I know God will take care of yall too. I hope you continue to feel a peace! much love, lacie

Marie said...

It's tough out there right now for us Katy but if there is anything I can do to help let me know. If you want to meet with a recruiter so we can market you I can get that set up for you. It'll all be okay, enjoy your time with Denver. :)